Is it the Wine Talking?

First off I'm built of more whips than Nae Nae's. If I'm not working I'm lying in bed. In my life time I've probably bought 10 bottles of wine. Since Christmas of 2020 I've gone through 40 bottles of wine. I'm not proud of it, I don't need it, but it helps me not think. I don't really have an appetite for anything anymore. I remember getting ready for school when I was little. My sister and I would get up extra early to dress my brother in the front of the fireplace. We didn't have central heating, but we had a fireplace. I'll never forget that goddamn fireplace, because my sister and I had to stack wood after school every goddamn day. The shit got old really fast, cord after cord after cord of wood. I remember one time my mother came out to help us stack wood and a gardener snake came out and she flipped the fuck out. She grabbed a hoe and chopped up that motherfucker into 18,000 goddamn pieces. That poor gardener snake didn't have a chance. I noticed that I cuss a lot more when I get a little buzz, but I don't feel anything anymore I'm numb and then I pass out and go to sleep. I wake up and I'm fucking thirsty for water and I have to face the day. I've never been this more depressed in my entire life but I don't care. It was bound to happen. I think to myself why can't anybody ever love me. But then what does it matter I spent my whole entire life without one person even giving a shit that I was an option. I know, I know there's been times when I loved myself but there's been times where I'm like who the fuck are you Mr. Mind? So why care now. I'm done being upset. This sucks because I do still care. The word caring in my life has gotten me inches so far. Its as if the word caring means to do the moonwalk in life. But let me tell you whatever I bought tonight is goddamn awful, the wine is awful. One time my sister and I were in the front yard arguing about something. I don't really know what we were arguing about, but it made my mom mad and she pounded on my sisters window which faced the front yard. My mother started pounding on my sisters window and telling us to be quiet. My mother didn't know her own strengths and broke the window. My sister and I started laughing at her. We ended up getting grounded because my mother broke the window. I guess she was angry at us, I don't really remember, I just remember her face when she broke the window. It was hilarious. I don't know how to be myself around anybody anymore. My best friend Tony he is the only one who really knows knows whats going on. He's always been by my side since six grade. I had to change schools in the middle of sixth grade. That does a lot on a kid, not to mention a kid with a limp. On my second day of six grade at the new school, Tony and I started swinging on the swings and my shoe came off and hit a girl in the face. Her name was Beth, she got a scar right next to her eye and nobody messed with me after that. I felt bad she sat right next to me during band class. I played the clarinet but I was last chair because I hated playing the clarinet. I know my blogs don't make sense all the time and this is no exception. Wine it! Cheers.

----The Blue Nun----Our evening began in Peter Seychelle's comfortable study In his new york townhouse Where the candle light was just right The hi-fi was in the background And the wine was delicious What's the secret, Peter? Naturally, I'll say it's the wine Mmm, it does go well with the chicken Delicious again, Peter